I have been using EMDR, breath work (in combination with cold showers), meditation + yoga for trauma. Damn. Besides a rant I had today (which was warranted!), I have kept my mood reasonably stable, my emotions have been even and hey, I have human experiences when pin-pricked but with all that gets chucked at me … Read morethe hanged man
When you showed up and started speaking your lines, I guess we both thought you would be there forever. Except for one or two of you (we knew it was always meant to be a walkon). No matter how many good, indifferent, horrid, tea, coffee, wine, or sexy times we might have experienced together, not … Read moreto all of the guest stars in my story
Why do we lie? Sometimes it is because we think that people will not accept us the way we are. Or, If every time someone makes a mistake we victimise ourselves and ask, “how could you do this to me?,” they will begin to cover up parts of themselves so they do not hurt you. … Read moretake it easy
I am writing this post on the 19th, the day before I am due to leave for my trip. I know the days are going to be hectic and I want to make sure this post is made properly. Today is five years since Will’s left us. The weekend before I left, I was properly … Read moreFive Years
1/2 way there. I am trying to watch the new Matrix film enroute and my goodness it is really not very good. I am waiting for it to be over. They managed to turn it into a romance. Which you know, I totally needed today. I do appreciate the nostalgia. I remember the first time … Read moreWhy use old code to do something new
As I move forward with Healing Developmental Trauma, I hit feelings in places I did not know feels could be hit. And then I realise how I am passing the torch. “professional insight into a predictable set of trauma symptoms and deeply ingrained behaviours that result when a child does not get the core developmental … Read more13:23
“First be really honest with yourself: what have you allowed in your life that you never wanted in the first place.” I had this reoccurring knack. I would notice something that I did not like, I would either speak up and say, “no, this is not cool” and it would continue with no consequence or … Read morestrings and attractors
There is a song called, “Engine Driver“, by The Decemberist. It is probably one of the saddest songs I have ever heard. I do not know why it hits me the way it does, me the eternal goth girl that has listened to hundreds of thousands of hours of The Cure and Joy Division (and … Read morethe art of being unbothered
Phew. I had not expected the response that I have received from my last post. And who knew you could gaslight yourself? I have been sitting here thinking about how to answer the questions posed to me and I am unsure how. In that link above, they say there is a difference between gaslighting yourself … Read moreone fine day
I started a conversation in two parts with two different people over the past 24 hours. My brain hurts because I have not had a chance to come to a conclusion in either one of them. I mean, I rarely come to a full stop in any chat but this one is plaguing my thoughts. … Read morerhinestone eyes