Wed. May 18th, 2022
drama queen

: a person given to often excessively emotional performances or reactions.

1923 has the first recorded usage of the term drama queen. Is this an insult? Generally, yes. Drama queens experience life as a rollercoaster. Relationships are wonderful, then dreadful. People storm out of jobs, get cheated on, and are part of intense, unstable relationships.

Attention seems to be a common denominator when we ask why a drama queen is the way they are. They often feel unnoticed or the attention they do get is negative. People that need to be the centre of attention often have personality disorders. And let us not dismiss that they can be raised by parents that have personality disorders – hurray for trauma! Lack of stability helps to make that need (the banshee howl, rather) to be in the spotlight no matter the cost.

I have never known a drama queen that did not have cripplingly low self-esteem. This circles back to the trauma(s).


I relate to drama queens. I am a performer too. I just cannot be on all the time like they are. And I do not manipulate and control as they do. I am not extraordinarily demanding. I know everything is not all about me. I just keep talking because I am not sure how to stop (see: neurodiversity).

If you asked a drama queen what was actually amazing about them, the deep stuff, you may not be surprised that they would come up empty.

Anger, jealousy, and uncontrollable sadness live in those places and you are not invited. Those are not pretty, manicured hallways to be raved about.

Those ugly avenues are only allowed to be summoned when they need stabbing points.

This is not a shaming post, this is a bright, sunny morning to understand yourself. Do you see yourself in any of these words? (nods)

1. avoid giving any advice unless you are asked
2. know your limits. say no if you need to
3. mind your business
4. be honest
5. feelings are not facts
6. focus on yourself
7. stay calm. do not react
8. be kind. apologise even if you did nothing wrong. sometimes it is best to just leave things alone and let them win.
9. do not get sucked into the drama
10. set boundaries and keep them

Accept that the only person that you can change is YOU.