Wed. May 18th, 2022

What causes one to stalk?

If we take the definition “to follow” with the idea that sometimes people cannot let go because we have cut contact before they understood things were done.

Or before they understood why.

I have had my share of stalkers. It has been painfully pointed out to me that I have a tendency to walk away and not explain myself very well. I leave relationships of all kinds like this. When I am done, I cut communication and that is that.

And then the stalking begins.

My internet presence begins to light up. Every word I have every written is combed over. My friends are sometimes contacted. I have blocked them for talking to me in many cases because that is just my way of making sure I do not get the urge to say hello on their birthdays or holidays.

When I used this space to vent my feelings about my relationship(s), it never occurred to me that this behaviour would perpetuate here.

I did not realise that my bad relationship could also be someone else’s bad relationship.

It is not fair to use me as your gateway to get revenge.

I do not know what happened nor do I want to. It has nothing to do with me. I am doing what I can to deal with what has happened to me so I can heal and move on. Adding your portion of the story is mudding the water and is making things so much more complicated.

Please.

I get it. Being used and tossed aside is unfair. The anger can probably make you want to set people and things aflame.

But there are things you do not know about me and my life. And by doing what you are doing you are making things very hard. And wow they are already hard enough.

Maybe the right thing to do is to confront him. Maybe enough time has gone by that he will listen. Maybe he did not know the damage he caused.

I am not defending him – he is the last human right now that I would do that for, trust me.

But doing what you are doing is dragging me into something that I do not want to be part of.